With less than a week to go, the Repubs need a good closing argument. Not that “We will suck way less than they did” or “we’ll bankrupt you more slowly” aren’t solid contenders.

The full repeal of Obamacare is probably not going to happen, but even though there’s plenty of gutting that could happen to slow it down, that promise will be hard to deliver.

 So here’s what I would promise:

* The return of the incandescent lightbulb as an acceptable light source

* The removal of the mandate of the 1.5 gallon flush toilets

* IRS layoffs (I never knew so many people getting audited at once, seriously, it’s crazy)

* Put Daylight Savings Time back where it was

* Photo ID to vote (I actually think that one is really stinking important) and thumbprint on provisional and absentee ballots. That or the purple thumb.

* Removal of any kind of campaign finance laws. It’s a free for all already. Call a spade a spade wilya? And we can make Soros spend his fortune in the process.

* Stop ethanol. (ADM has a lot of politicians in its pocket, but break the cycle of madness.) Gas prices would come down pretty quickly.

* Make the TV in the Democrat Lounge only tunable to a loop of Jersey Shore episodes.

That ought to be a start.